I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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