It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
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