i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
