And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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