I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
