u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
