windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I am available for nakedness
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize