oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize