New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
