BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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