We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize