spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
