Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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