So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
