Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
splinters make it hard to masturbate
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
