i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Randomize
