I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
thus making me awesome and them whores
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
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