it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
