I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Randomize
