Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize