found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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