Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Randomize