I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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