We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
