if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
