And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
