Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
