Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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