erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
