okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
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