Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize