He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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