If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
