girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
