i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
