listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
