All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Couch. On fire.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize