What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
