she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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