Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Randomize
