Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
