didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
