no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
