On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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