fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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