Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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