I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
