I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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