Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
