Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
