dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
So squirting runs in the family.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
