That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
